mindgame

It's 4:30 in th morning and I still can't sleep. My mind is overwhelmed with so many words thoughts ..I felt I can't sleep unless I write down some of them. Whenever I think about mind I just get so much amazed, may be mind is the most ingenious creation of God (atheists please find your own suitable term). I am thinking aloud now!! have you ever tried controlling your mind I mean making it think whatever you want it to think. try doing that and I can assure you will be thinking 10 different things but not the intended one. But does that mean you can't think what you want ! of course you can ..but just don't try too hard, Mr. mind is a free soul if you try to dictate it won't give a damn .. now there is a paradox here. when I am saying 'you' control mind ..can u tell me what is represented by 'you'. isn't it the same mind? please don't say 'you' is heart..I think heart is nothing but an instrument that keeps animals(including human beings) alive by circulating blood. Talking about paradox made me think something else ..am really writing this blog or is this just a dream, or a dream inside a dream ..and so on ! frankly I have no way to prove that.I already said I am thinking aloud so pardon me if you find this post absolutely out of order. Long time back I have discovered I have two contradicting personalities inside me ..the asshole me and the emotional me .. and usually both of them are present at the same time.. let me give you one example .. I still sometimes find it quite amusing to read the crap people usually put down in their about me in orkut ..unless it is an one page essay with ascii flowers or trees . The most hilarious ones are those with lots of keywords like 'mah' 'da' 'attitude' 'cool' 'rock' etc. this was the asshole me ! now i don't know why at the same time my emotional me pop up and try to see what that guy or girl has written in his 'from my past relationships i learned' . Usually it's mostly lots of ...chucha chucha ..( courtesy Ajay Devgan - Sunday) ..the one I liked till now was ' I can be better'..
After reading so many different scraps/posts sometimes I think I can write a research paper on attention seeking first scraps. But it is definitely not the time for that ..it's already 5 and I need to crash ..